Monday, 26 August 2013

It Gets Better.....Well It Has For Me!

Almost 6 months ago to the day I wrote this post (Here) about how my parents did not take the news of our engagement well at all. Re-reading the post is hard in itself, at the time I was at the stage of deciding if we should cut my parents out of our lives.............

Fast forward 6 months and I wanted to record an update - where better to do it than our blog?!

Yesterday Laura and I did what I am sure hundreds of Brits do on a bank holiday weekend - we went to the parents' . What makes this unique for us is that it was my parents' house we were at. It was the first time in 4 years that we drove home as a couple, were welcomed as a couple and spent the day hanging out with family as a couple before leaving to drive home together.

We arrived at 2pm as my Mum had asked us to help get the house ready before the rest of the family arrived. This meant an hour was spent moving chairs and tables, but left an hour for sitting around catching up. That's right,the 4 of us - Laura, me, my Mum and my Dad together- it's all I ever wanted. I knew in my heart that there was no reason why we couldn't all get on, and yesterday proved it.

By the time the rest of the family arrived we had caught up on all our latest news and were in a good place, it was a great way to start the day. As with my 30th party - the one where Laura had been invited without my knowledge and I officially got more for my birthday that I could have hoped for (full post)-  the gathering was in my parents' back garden and we just chilled with my sister and her boyfriend, Aunt and Uncle and cousin and his girlfriend.

Nothing particularly eventful happened, L and I both found out that we are relatively good at boules and not too bad at quiz games, but that's all I ever wanted to happened- us just to be accepted into my family, no drama.

At points I would stand and watch the scene without anyone knowing - not creepy I promise- and wipe a tear of joy away. How can so much have changed in 6 months?

Driving back yesterday L and I were talking about how things have gotten better, we were trying to find out if there was a turning point or something that happened to tip things towards acceptance, especially with my Dad, and neither of us could think of one single moment where everything changed. How strange is that - over 6 months things just changed!

Whenever I have been sent encouraging emails, messages or comments by the wonderful supportive people who read our blog, I always get overcome with emotion and feel so grateful that someone would take that time to share their story and advice with me. Although I always felt somewhat challenged and unable to accept that things would get better for me, for us. It wasn't that I didn't want to believe, it was in giving myself hope I feared that if things didn't get better it would be harder.

The thing I have learnt in the 4 and a half years with L is that you have to expect the unexpected - with family, with friends, with colleagues and with complete strangers, both in the positive and negative. The biggest challenge, however, is being prepared for the reactions- I don't think I could ever advise anyone on when and how it gets better, or how to prepare for it but I could not be more thankful that L has always been there to listen to me.

I know our journey is just getting started and I couldn't be happier with where we are right now. In less than 2 weeks we will be over in the USA seeing our wedding plans come to life and this time I won't be worried to come back and sharing details with my family. My Dad won't be joining us for the wedding - that issue isn't resolved although he's come further in the last 6 months than I could have imagined- and to everyone else -my Mum, my sister, my extended family, Laura's family and of course my amazing Laura, I am so amazed thankful and overwhelmed that differences aside they have all pulled together to support me.


  1. This is lovely to hear! Congratulations! Love youz! Mum xoxo

  2. This is SO amazing to hear, I am so very happy for you two... :D

    1. Thank you! We can hardly believe the change! We are staying overnight at theirs tonight so her Dad can take us to the airport. Crazy!


  3. This brought tears to my eyes - having gone through a metamorphisis with my own family a short while back. Sometimes, there are little angels in your parents' lives who also step in, give some good insights, etc. I am so happy for you.


    1. Thank you so much! Yes I'm sure we had help in having them come around - it's just more than we could have ever dreamed! :) x

  4. You guys deserve so much happiness. I'm so glad to hear this!


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